How to prepare for mediation and what happens on the day.

Why preparation decides the outcome.

A mediation is a negotiation, and negotiations are won and lost in the preparation. The party who has thought through their case, the other side's case, and the range of acceptable outcomes negotiates from a position of clarity. The party who turns up to see what happens is at the mercy of the room. You do not need to be a lawyer to prepare well, but you do need to do the thinking before the day.

This is general information, not advice on your dispute. Every mediation is different, and the right approach depends on the case and the other side. What follows are the steps that help in almost any mediation, whether it is a neighbour dispute at a Community Justice Centre or a commercial claim with lawyers in the room.

Know your best and worst outcomes.

Before you mediate, work out what happens if there is no deal. Lawyers call this the best and worst alternative to a negotiated agreement. If the case goes to a hearing, what is the best result you could realistically get, what is the worst, and what will it cost you in money, time and stress to get there? Those answers set the frame for every offer you make and receive on the day.

This matters because a mediated deal only makes sense if it beats your realistic alternative. If a hearing might get you twenty thousand dollars but could get you nothing, and would cost fifteen thousand to run, then a settlement of fifteen thousand at mediation looks very different from the twenty thousand you dreamed of. Knowing your alternative stops you rejecting a good deal or accepting a bad one.

Set your bottom line before you walk in.

Decide, in advance, the least you will accept or the most you will pay to settle. This is your bottom line, and it should be a considered figure, based on your alternatives, not a number you pluck out under pressure. Having it fixed before you arrive protects you from being talked into a deal you will regret, and from walking away from a deal you should take because the moment felt tense.

A bottom line is private. You do not announce it, and you should expect the other side to have one too. The space between the two bottom lines is where a deal is possible. Part of the mediator's job is to find that space. Your job is to know your own limit clearly enough that you recognise a fair deal when it is on the table and hold firm when it is not.

What documents should you bring?

Bring the documents that prove your case and the numbers behind it. For a debt, that is the contract, the invoices, and the record of what was paid. For a building dispute, the quote, the photos, and any expert report. For a neighbour dispute, the survey, the correspondence, and any council records. You want to be able to put your hand on the document that answers a question, because being able to prove a point quietly is more persuasive than asserting it loudly.

Organise the documents so you can find them. A mediation moves between rooms and topics, and fumbling for a key paper wastes the moment. If lawyers are involved they will handle this, but a self-represented party benefits enormously from arriving with a tidy folder and a one-page summary of the key dates and figures. Preparation shows, and it signals to the other side that you are ready to run the case if the mediation fails.

What happens on the day?

A mediation usually opens with everyone together, where the mediator explains the process and each side gives a short opening. Keep your opening calm and factual; it sets the tone. The parties then often separate into different rooms, and the mediator shuttles between them with offers and questions. This is the stage where the real movement happens, and it can take hours, so pace yourself and expect a slow start before things shift.

Offers usually move in steps, with each side giving ground gradually. Do not be rattled by an opening offer that seems far apart from yours; that is normal, and the gap narrows through the day. If a deal is reached, it is written down and signed before you leave, which makes it binding, as our guide on binding mediation agreements explains. If not, nothing said can be used later, and the case goes on.

How should you behave in the room?

Stay calm, listen, and separate the person from the problem. Mediation works best when the parties attack the dispute, not each other. Losing your temper feels satisfying and achieves nothing; it hardens the other side and wastes the day. Let the mediator manage the tension, and focus your energy on the outcome you want rather than on being proved right.

Be willing to move, but not past your bottom line. A mediation where neither side shifts goes nowhere, so expect to give ground and look for creative solutions the other side can accept, such as a payment plan or a non-money term. At the same time, hold your limit. The best mediators help both sides feel they got a fair deal, and the best-prepared parties are the ones who make that possible.

Primary sources: mediation in NSW civil proceedings is provided for in Part 4 of the Civil Procedure Act 2005 (NSW), which protects the confidentiality of mediation and limits the use of what is said, so parties can negotiate freely. Free community mediation is available under the Community Justice Centres Act 1983 (NSW). NSW mediation decisions are searchable on JADE.

Common questions

How do you prepare for a mediation?

Work out what happens if there is no deal, the best and worst outcomes at a hearing and what it would cost; set a private bottom line, the least you will accept or the most you will pay; and gather the documents that prove your case and the numbers behind it. Arriving with that clarity lets you negotiate from strength rather than reacting on the day.

What is a bottom line in mediation?

It is the least you will accept, or the most you will pay, to settle, decided in advance and based on your realistic alternatives. Keeping it private and fixed protects you from being talked into a deal you will regret, and from walking away from one you should take. The space between each side's bottom line is where a deal is possible.

What should you bring to a mediation?

The documents that prove your case and the numbers behind it: for a debt, the contract, invoices and payment records; for a building dispute, the quote, photos and any expert report; for a neighbour dispute, the survey and correspondence. Organise them so you can find the key paper quickly, and bring a short summary of the main dates and figures.

What happens on the day of a mediation?

It usually opens with everyone together, the mediator explaining the process and each side giving a short opening. The parties then often separate, and the mediator shuttles between rooms with offers and questions. Offers move in steps and the gap narrows through the day. If a deal is reached it is written down and signed on the day; if not, nothing said can be used later.

How should you behave in a mediation?

Stay calm, listen, and attack the problem rather than the person. Let the mediator manage the tension and focus on the outcome you want, not on being proved right. Be willing to give ground and look for creative solutions, but hold your bottom line. Well-prepared, composed parties are the ones who reach fair deals.

To speak to a litigation lawyer, call Aaron Kernaghan on 0421 717 019.

This article is written by Aaron Kernaghan, Special Counsel at Good Legal Lawyers, as at 30 August 2026. It is general information and reflects the personal opinion of the author only. It is not legal advice, it is not a substitute for advice on your own matter, and it does not purport to be accurate or complete. The law changes and procedure varies from case to case. For advice on a specific matter, contact Aaron Kernaghan on 0421 717 019 or contact the firm.

More commentary by Aaron Kernaghan.

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